Guts and Grog Tooned Up

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

30 Day Horror Challenge day 27

     A guilty pleasure?  That is not easy for someone that proudly watches every movie ever that has the man eater logo on it.  I watch Theodore Rex, yeah that movie with Whoopi Goldberg and the dinosaur with chucks on and text everyone I know to tell them I am watching it for the third night in a row.  I shout from the rooftops my love for Blood Freak and Troll 2.  I look at the web store for The Asylum all the time planning out what sweet coffee mug from what 80's Pop Star movie I wanna drink my morning cup of joe out of. I read Mr Gable's Reality everyday to see what he has to recommend. I love bad shit and I am not ashamed.  "Gonna have me some fun."  Well when thinking about it I came up with one that stood out.
     Uwe Boll. This guy is one of the most hated directors out there.  Most of his movies are garbage.  I mean really fucking bad.  Alone in the Dark, Christian Slater gave a better performance in Kuffs.  Bloodrayne was so bad when it was over I couldn't even talk. Now we get to my choice. House of the dead, based off a video game where you shoot zombies.  That is about all the movie is. He interwove actual video game footage into this.The guy from Das Boot is in it and acts about as well as Shaq in Kazaam .  Lois Lane is in it and shows her titties which is sweet and makes up for the anger I felt during Butterfly Effect 2 when I was ripped off.  The editing, the writing, the acting its all shit, but you know what? I love it, I love all of Dr Bolls shitty ass movies. I am a bit ashamed but that's OK. A couple years ago he released the "funny version" and it was so fucking brilliant. Its like MST3K with Uwe Boll.  I will continue to watch his shit waiting for Auschwitz which I am guessing is gonna be the most offensive movie ever made.  I salute my lord and master Dr Boll for beating his critics and me into submission.


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