Friday, February 25, 2011
Drive Angry 3D- Patrick Lussier
Drive Angry is one big orgasm, right from the start it penetrates every hole you have and gives no apologies. Nicholas Cage is less crazy then usual but still fucking hilarious and bad ass. Amber Heard is so fucking sexy that after I left I had to walk around like a greater than symbol the whole way home. William Fichtner gives one of the best performances I have seen in a long fucking time. He is so subtly condescending, arrogant and laugh out loud hilarious that I stopped thinking about Amber Heards ass, briefly but still that has to mean something. Everyone in this is at the top of their game, sure I'm guessing Oscars wont be handed out but everyone is entertaining as shit. All the supporting cast is great as well, Christa Campbell, David Morse, the dad from the rapey eyed vampire films and of course mother fucking ATKINS!!!!
The plot is simple, Nicholas Cage is pissed because his daughter eats dick hangs out with crazy Christ freaks that are actually Satan loving hippies and gets herself killed. He comes back from "prison" to make jokes, fuck, fight, shoot in slowmo and drive like James Taylor. Along the way he has to deal with old enemies, cops, cult members and an accountant from hell.
This movie does not need to be analyzed, it doesn't matter. It is a road revenge supernatural action comedy full of nudity, gore, and car chases. Its a popcorn movie, only its a popcorn movie where you pull your dick out, cum all over the popcorn, set it on fire and throw a baby on the semen covered bucket in hopes that the dark lord will take you on a joy ride.